I heard an interesting story on NPR this morning that aroused the feminist in me. C’mon. You knew she was there.
A teenage girl protested a T-shirt sold by (maybe also created by) JC Penney that said “I’m too pretty for homework.” In five hours, the story of a circulating petition to remove it from the shelves was getting 400 tweets a minute. Ten hours after she first posted her opinion via social media, JC Penney ditched the shirt.
The story mentioned a few other instances of companies pulling similar shirts due to social media protests. (I think I’ve found a new reason to love Facebook and Twitter!) One that really ruffled my feathers was from Gymboree that stated something along the lines of “I’m smart like my dad and pretty like my mom.”
Sure, some people may laugh at these messages. And true, as a general rule we could lighten up a little. But the bottom line is they make the shirts because there is a market for them. We buy them and perpetuate the message that girls should desire beauty above all.
That makes me sad. Very sad. Because I have a daughter who happens to be creative, inventive, intelligent and so much more. Very recently she discovered that she can’t be president, because she looks at a placemat of Presidents in our home every day with 43 male faces on it. A girl as president? She deduced: “Not very likely so why bother?”
I hope it does, but I’m not optimistic at the moment. We live in a world that, interestingly enough, increasingly values the looks of women over her intellect, experience or accomplishments. It seems worse now than when I was a teen. In Lisa Bloom’s book, Think: Straight Talk for Women to Stay Smart in a Dumbed-Down World, she reports that 15 to 18 percent of girls under 12 wear mascara, eyeliner and lipstick regularly; eating disorders are up and self-esteem is down; and 25 percent of young American women would rather win America's Next Top Model than the Nobel Peace Prize. "Even bright, successful college women say they'd rather be hot than smart."
I can understand why. Any woman who takes a risk and puts herself “out there” is subject to constant criticism. She will live her life under the microscope. But unlike men in the public eye, women are also examined and critiqued for their physicality.
Is it any wonder girls and women struggle with depression and general unhappiness. The very things they love – reading books, being a leader, generating ideas and being valued for accomplishments – aren’t even embraced by society.
It’s so hard to reinforce to girls that they need to ignore these messages of body type and beauty that are thrown in their faces from infancy on. My daughter told me the other day that she’s worried about having wrinkles when she’s in heaven. Wow. I can’t believe this is the kind of thing a 9-year-old girl feels she needs to contemplate.
I feel the need to remind her and all girls that they should see themselves as God sees them. The Lord says in 1 Samuel 16:7 “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”
And what about the oh-so-intimidating Proverbs 31 woman? God’s illustration of an ideal woman. She works hard, takes care of her home, is respected. Her husband and children trust her. Her character is beautiful. Because she has her priorities in order and places God above all, she is revered. From verses 30 and 31, God reminds us that we should be aware of earthly values and how we rank them in our lives: “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.”
What I want my daughter to seek is the blessing of the Lord and her family, not the acceptance of her peers or the things society puts value on. I want her to protest the shirt that speaks of earthly beauty. I want you to join me and speak out against those messages. It’s not just a shirt. It’s a mindset that is stifling our girls and their potential to be the woman God wants them to be.
What can we do today to dispel the myths of beauty? How can we fight against the societal message that girls should chase physical attractiveness all their days? What will you do that will show one other girl or woman that we value one another for our inner beauty?
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