New Year's Resolutions: My Pet Peeve

It really wasn't all that long ago that I was making New Year's "resolutions." You know, those little promises (aka white lies) we make to ourselves to feel better about the opportunity (aka blank slate) that was plopped in front of us with the purchase of an all-new, empty calendar. A new page, a new leaf -- whatever you want to call it -- the New Year has become a parking spot for dreams and wishes.

Or, just the opposite for some.

Because you see, in time, enough of these dreams and wishes go unfulfilled that we give up on resolutions.

For the last several days, I've read of my Facebook friends either throwing in the towel -- already -- on a resolution or simply resolving not to resolve in order to avoid the inevitable letdown.

I understand. And that's why I decided no more resolutions just a few years ago. I'm so glad!

But I did not and will not give up on dreams and wishes. What I did was turn my resolution into a game plan. I think you should, too! Yogi Berra sums up why in this simple quote: "You got to be careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there."

Many of us breeze through life as if it's happening to us, and we have no control. In fact, your life is yours -- a gift from God -- and you can lead it instead of letting it take you on an unwanted path. John Maxwell says in one of his books on leadership: "Someday people will summarize your life in a single sentence. My advice: pick it now!"

Right now I'm in the second chapter of Dave Ramsey's book "EntreLeadership," and I love how he talks about dreams that while great, are not well-defined -- "big and fuzzy and in the clouds." That's kind of like resolutions, and that's why every year, I categorize several goals for myself. But I don't stop there, I include a list of resources (money, help from others, etc.) I will need to accomplish them and how or when I will accomplish them. Statistically speaking, people who write out their goals are significantly more likely to reach them. From experience, I have found that to be true as last year I checked off nearly every goal I set out to conquer.

Ramsey says dreams must be accompanied by a vision and mission statement. Even God advises us to adopt a vision as the Proverbs mention "Where there is no vision, people perish." It's not just why businesses fail, Ramsey says. "Where there is no vision, your marriage will fail, your family will be dysfunctional, you will stumble in your spiritual walk, you will get fat and flabby, and your money will disappear."

On my spreadsheet (no lie...I've made a spreadsheet with blank spots for me to check in quarterly to record my progress. I'm type A; can you tell??), I've got three goals in each of these categories: Family and Home; Financial and Career; Spiritual; Social and Cultural; Mental and Educational; and Physical and Health.

Dave Ramsey also recounts in "EntreLeadership" how he was encouraged by a mentor to write out a mission statement for his business and for himself. "Truthfully I hated doing it at first," he writes. "To sit down and put words to who we are and what that means was very hard. I guess some people like this stuff, but I felt like I had a term paper due. As I surrendered myself to a process that was stretching me, it became exciting. This idea of saying who we are out loud began to have some life-changing power as I worked on it."

It was encouraging to me that even Ramsey is resistant to change. I know I have been, and embracing change can sometimes be a process. But a mission statement with "life-changing power?" Wow. That sounds worth it!

Here's what John Maxwell has to say about change:

* Don't change just enough to get away from your problems -- change enough to solve them.
* Don't change your circumstances to improve your life -- change yourself to improve your circumstances.
* Don't do the same old things expecting to get different results -- get different results by doing something new.
* Don't wait to see the light to change -- start changing as soon as you feel the heat.
* Don't see change as something hurtful that must be done -- see it as something helpful that can be done.
* Don't avoid paying the immediate price of change -- if you do, you will pay the ultimate price of never improving.

I felt sad seeing my friends' posts about not changing or not making commitments to change this year. However, I understand. I've been there, too. And I hope someday you'll reevaluate that! We should always be moving or "Failing FORWARD," another Maxwell book, lest we become victims of our circumstances. This to me is the key to success, and it can be painful because oftentimes change means failing or at least risk of failing, which is viewed by society as negative to say the least. But good leaders know failing is often along the road to success. It's most certainly a tool God uses to grow and shape us. And I know it has a happy ending as Ephesians 2:10 says "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them."

That sounds life-changing and totally worth it!
Hope you think so, too.
Much love,
A